Here's something that I never realized..

Until I started working again.. I FART a lot! I guess being at home, with my boys, just letting em go whenever.. did not prepare me so well for being in an environment where I just simply can't do that.. I never realized either how gassy I am. Jeez, what's up with that? Nor did I realize how many times I would start laughing (and I do that a lot here, my sister is with me, and we pretty much crack each other up on a regular basis..) and have to squeeze those glutes and hold it in! It's horrible! I guess if any good comes of this it will be that I'm exercising my ass more than ever! Hah!

Second showing, and the house that I want to buy..

We have another showing to the cool couple with nice shoes tomorrow.. My poor husband has to get the house ready without me as I'll be working.. I'm still not sure if I want to move, but I did find a house that I could live in.. Here it is..

Douchebagastino..

There's a new guy at work, yes a guy! There are actually 2.. it really cuts down on the drama having men here.. I like it.. But this poor schmuck gets to be picked on by more than one of the females here.. just because it's fun. This is the new guys nickname.. although he doesn't know it yet.. He also happens to be a relative of mine.. twice removed by marriage or something like that! They're everywhere!

Work Day #1..

Well, my first full day of work in over 3 years, is almost over.. and let me correct myself here, and say the first full day of work outside of my own house! Work that doesn't involve changing diapers, or doing laundry, dishes..etc.
I must say it's been a wonderful day.. It's about 95 degrees outside, yet I'm cool and comfy in my air conditioned office. I got to hang out with my sister for the day.. she was a big help to me in getting me readjusted to everything that I don't normally do during my night shift.. I only got one phone call from home, where it sounded like my husband had everything under control. He woke up bright and early this morning and made a schedule for the boys. It went a little like this.. 7-8 am breakfast, and cartoons. 8-9 computer games, 9-10 arts and crafts, 10-11 free time.. and so on.. I thought it was pretty clever.. and the boys were really excited about it. Especially my oldest son who is so used to schedules from school. I dont' know if at some point he just tossed the schedule and let them have the remote.. we'll see when I get home!
I'm interested to see what shape my house is in.. I'm hoping it's as clean as when I left, but I'm doubting that. I'm not going to expect too much from my husband on the first day. So, anyway, I think I'm going to do just fine working part time.. It was sad leaving this morning, but by about noon, I felt just fine! ahhhhhh..

Diarrhea..

I don't have it yet, but my stomach has been butterflies all night.. I'm working an 8 hour day tomorrow.. and it's been a while.. I've never left the girls for that long, although they'll be in the capable hands of my husband.. but I'm freaking out just a bit.. Ugh.. I'm off to bed, hoping to get some good sleep, and manage to get out of here in the morning without crapping myself silly! nice huh?

Best Friends..

Here are my 2 nieces, who I used to care for when they were babies.. They now go to the same day care and are in the same class... They are best friends! It's so cute..

The many faces of my niece.. Here she is finding out that her mom is having 2 babies..And moments later finding out that they're 2 boys!

Love Notes...

To my husband on his first day of summer vacation.. and me returning to work next week!! Love you Buddy!!

Pooped..

This is how I'm feeling today.. we showed the house yesterday and I spent a good 4 hours cleaning.. we hadn't had any interest in about a month, so I had really let the cleaning go.. I still don't want to sell, but neither my husband or I can seem to grow a pair and tell our agent/friend that.. the people were here for a good 40 minutes.. I saw them as I was leaving.. young, cute couple.. nice shoes, someone I would want to hang with.. 40 minutes is a good sign, and I guess if we could afford to buy another house in this town, I'd be thrilled at the prospect.. but we can't, so I'm not! ugh..

Summer's Here.. and new summer doo's..

Here they are.. the pride of my existence.. along with my niece in the top photo..the boys have their brand new summer hair cuts.. keeping them nice and cool.. and the girls hair is long enough now that I can put a tiny pony tail on the top of their heads (like Pebbles..) so cheezy, but after 7 years of just boys.. well, let's just say they are going to be in pink A LOT!

This girl was on the front page of our local newspaper.. Apparently she's going to be getting some jail time for driving drunk, getting pissed, and grabbing the arresting officers crotch! She'll only spend 3 days in jail.. just enough time to make some friends.. she's an aspiring model (um, no kidding, are those lips real??) She also was ordered to live with her mother, get a job, and be home by 8 pm every night! Sounds like an exciting life for a 21 year old model wannabe! Bummer..

Ultrasound results for my sister..

My sister had her ultrasound today.. and she's having 2 BOYS!! I knew it.. of course I know everything ;) The babies are looking really good, everyone's growing just fine.. and now we have to start buying boy clothes! Yea for boys!

Duties..

My poor poor constipated pregnant sister.. Anyone who's been pregnant, knows that having a regular, easy going shit, are a thing of the past. One would also know that if you gotta go, you gotta go..

So this is what happened to her yesterday, at work.. Into the bathroom she goes, does her business.. flushes, and yes, clogs up the toilet that is right inside her little cluster of offices.. Poor girl! What makes it worse, is that she now has to call maintenance, since plungers are not readily available, and have some poor schmuck come over and unclog her very clogged toilet. I do think she was able to maintain some anonymity, when the guy came over to do his job, but she was no doubt horrified that this man had to view such a private, and yes, disgusting part of her..

This bathroom is literally steps away from my sister's desk, and all the while, she can hear the sounds coming from the bathroom, mostly made by the maintenance guy, groaning about the job he is performing.. It's only made worse when the man is about to leave, and in a rather smart, snide way, says to the ladies in the office "Well, I'm off to take care of the rest of my duties" (get it, doodies??) I'm guessing next time, she'll find a more private bathroom, and possibly just leave any clog she might cause.. I'm just guessing!

STRAWBERRIES!

A friend of mine gave me 4 strawberry plants when this guy was born.. They have more than quadrupled since then and each June we get a ton of yummy juicy berries from my yard.. My husband hates them (something about the seeds, and his ass..) they are spreading like crazy.. The best way to eat them: dipped in sour cream, and rolled in brown sugar! Sounds rather bizarre, but it's delicious!

Hard to Believe..

Today is my son's last day of 1st grade... He told me last night it was kind of sad because he didn't know if he'd be going back to that school next year (in case we sell our house) I told him not to worry about it, and that I didn't want to move.. My husband was on line this morning, and wants to move to Houston. I told him we'd miss him..

My son and I waited for the bus this morning, for the last time this year, and just as the bus was pulling up he said to me "It's hard to believe that I'm going to be in second grade.." Yes, it is!

Success!!!

The first successful #2! Even though the only reason I knew it was coming was because he was giving himself a major wedgie (trying to hold it in), and even though he still needed a change of clothes because it had emerged ever so slightly, I'm still so proud of him! He's on his way!! Good job Turd Ferguson!

Twin Belly..

Here's my sister.. all prego with her twins.. she's about 17 weeks here, and looking just wonderful! That is seriously what I looked like at about 10 weeks, and she's not even in maternity clothes yet (beatch!!)

She finds out Tuesday what the sex is! I'm guessing boys.. so is she!

The girls are going to be 1 next month.. Hard to believe.. Here's my little man, who today, while out shopping, dragged me to the bathroom so he could do #1. No success with #2 yet, unless you consider success when the shit doesn't drop on your foot, and stays nicely in his tighty whitey's.. We'll get there.. eventually!

My Clematis..

We planted these 2 years ago (maybe 3) and they bloom beautifully every year.. It makes me laugh whenever I see the name of the plant.. I'm not quite sure how to pronounce it, but it always sounds like some sort of disease!

Before the Crash...

My husband and his band have a spot on my space.. check it out!

June 12th..

On this day..



-George H.W. Bush was born, in 1924
-Anne Frank was born, in 1929
-Jim Nabors (or Gomer Pile) was born in 1930



-In 1965, Sonny and Cher sang "I got you Babe" on American Bandstand"



-In 1994 OJ killed Nicole Brown and Ron Goldman (allegedly..)



-and most importantly, on this day in 1972.. I was born.. 4 minutes before my wombmate and dear sister.. Happy Birthday Sistah friend!

He had no idea what he was saying..

Today my 4 year old was telling me his favorite characters on his favorite shows. He has stopped incessantly asking me who my favorites are, so for that I am very pleased.. But here is what our conversation sounded like..
"Do you know who I like on Dora?"
"Who?"
"Boots. Do you know who I like on Spongebob?"
"Who?"
"Patrick. Do you know who I like on me?"
"Who??"
"You."

It took me a second to figure out what he was saying.. but it dawned on me that he was telling me that I am his favorite, on the show that is his life.. awhh.. for something that sounded so inappropriate, it was actually very sweet!

DNA Results..

I just got the DNA results on the girls, and they are identical! I don't know why I'm so excited about this.. maybe because I'm an identical twin, and my twin is pregnant with her own set of identical twins.. I didn't want my girls to miss out on how truly special (and yes freakish) this whole thing is..

Yeah for the miraculous splitting of an egg!!

More Poop..

Why must potty training be so difficult.. especially when it comes to the pooping?? My poor little boy.. he can totally control the peeing part now, he's a pro, and even goes in by himself, stands up, shakes it off, and even gets his clothes back on.. But for some reason, he can't quite master the poop.
I mentioned earlier that he was on his way to the potty a couple of days ago, with a turtle head emerging.. Well, it happened again tonight, while I was on my way to work, already running late. This time, I thought I would be proactive, and get him to the toilet myself. So, I picked him up under his arms, and ran.. We weren't 2 feet away from the bathroom door, when I felt something warm and squishy hit my foot. UGH!!!!! And of course there is a baby heading down the hallway following her mommy..
And where is my ever so helpful husband? The guy whose always there in a pinch? In the living room, covering his mouth with his t-shirt, trying not to gag. Nice.
My poor poor shitting himself silly little boy. He just can't seem to manage to know when to get to the potty for number 2! I'm sure he'll get the hang of it soon.. I'm just glad that I was there to handle it, if my husband had been the one to get shit all over his foot, I'm guessing he would have just passed out or something! good lord..

We love the sprinkler.. especially this little guy! So happy that summer is almost here!

Drinking on a Budget..

I found this wine at the local drug store.. for $2.99! Seriously, you can't beat that.. and ok, it tastes better by the second glass.. but with 4 kids, and a teacher's salary, it's a damn good find!

Tuna Talk..

What is the big deal about telling your 4 year old that his sister's don't have a penis.. that in fact they have something called a vagina? Of course the poor kid can't say such a big word with so many consanents, and is calling it "tuna" (I know.. I know..)
But so what?
I can't remember when I told my older son about our girly bits, but it was right around this age.. And it's not like I sat him down and decided that it was a good day to tell him that boys and girls are different in many ways.. But when he's talking about his sisters penis, and how it looks different than his, then it's time to tell the truth!
My husband thought it was in bad taste to be telling him.. But seriously, like anyone is going to know that when he says his sister has a tuna, that he's really talking about her va-jay-jay, right? Ugh..

Mr. Poopy

My youngest son is trying so hard to master the potty. He hasn't had an accident since he peed all over my mother in laws bathroom.. He's got a good clean record.. with the pee anyway..

Today he was outside playing with 2 cousins that were over visiting, when he ran inside, well, more like waddled.. "I have to pee.. but I think I have to poop too.." I already knew, despite his efforts, that he was already in the process of having his crap, right there in his boxers. So, as he's strutting down the hallway, and I'm running to the bathroom to get the toilet ready, I hear him moaning.. "Oh no, oh no.." I peek out the bathroom door, and see two huge turds sitting on my hallway runner.. and one baby crawling as fast as she could towards the wonderful dropping her brother had just left for her! I did manage to get the boy and the baby, and clean everything up in record time.

He was quite devastated though, mainly because last night I had just baked him a strawberry cake for doing so well on the potty, and he was afraid this was going to cost him his share of cake.. poor boy. Living for his sweets.. I reassured him that everyone has accidents and that it was ok.. he could have some cake for dessert.. phew!

One more..

This is one of my favorites.. I just finished it this morning, the last one for my son's teachers.. Damn, it's cute!

Long Lost Friend..

My son found one of the only binkies that I have not thrown away.. He asked if he could suck on it for a minute.. for some reason this prompted him to hike up his boxer shorts and go all Erkel on me.. funny little kid!

I'm hoping my sons teachers don't soon forget what a great kid he is.. especially when they're toting around their new bags! :)