Wednesday, May 31, 2006

A Better Day..

My husband was up early this morning, doing laundry, and last night after I left for work, he did the dishes, and got the kids their dinner. He did all this without saying a word to me. Which is fine, he knows at moments like this, it's better to just not talk to me. I always end up saying something that will just throw him over the edge (no matter how justified it might be). He left this morning, with "bye" under his breath.. I wasn't up to talking to him yet anyway, so it worked out.
I had to go to my dr's today and have more blood drawn.. I was just there last Thursday having my diabetes screening, and some idiot forgot to include on my lab order to check my iron level. The only thing I've really been worried about. I understand these things happen, and I wasn't too upset. It got my youngest and I out of the house for a bit.. with an excuse to do some shopping afterwards. This is what brings a smile to my face when I'm pissed at my hubby.. buying some clothes!! Which I need desperately. I got a ton of maternity clothes from my friends, but as it turns out, I'm much bigger than they ever got, and I've still got 2-3 months to go.. But I found some cute things, and my son and I each got a Happy Meal afterwards.. yes, I got one too, but it was so that I could get my oldest son the toy in it.. heaven forbid he got off the bus and saw his brother with something new, and nothing for him.
So, my husband came home after school today with a car full of baby stuff. The teachers at his school had a baby shower for him! I thought that was very sweet, and I was glad that he had to go through a baby shower.. this is his first one. I find them to be totally nerve racking.. it's hard for me to be the center of attention like that, and I'm guessing it must have been impossible for him! I'm not sure how they ran the baby shower, but he hadn't opened a thing! That broke the silence between us, and we opened the gifts together. He hasn't apologized, and I don't think he will, but we hugged, and both agreed that we weren't mad anymore.. Now we're starting to plan the girls room.. My youngest is going to be bunking with his brother soon, and I've got to pick out paint to make the babies room girly!! It's currently painted blueberry shake, and has a large Buzz Lightyear drawn on the wall.. I'm thinking a soft lilac..or subtle pink.. I can't wait to get all girly!! After 6 years with boys..this is going to be fun!!

Tuesday, May 30, 2006


Today has been a "wtf" kind of day.. It actually started in the middle of the night, when my kids and I start playing musical beds.. I ended up spending most of the night in my oldest sons twin bed, with him. Then at 5:30, when I hear my husband get out of the shower, I returned to my bed where my youngest is sleeping comfortably (thank god that everyone else is sleeping well!)
My husband came up at 7 to say he was leaving, my oldest had been downstairs with him for about 30 minutes, and my youngest was still fast asleep. He also wanted to tell me that the kitchen was a mess... no kidding.. I only knew this because I hadn't cleaned it from dinner last night, and if I hadn't cleaned it than no one had. I was a bit pissed when I got downstairs to see that my son hadn't had breakfast yet, and my husband hadn't even made his lunch for school. Basically he sat on the couch and got caught up on the news, had his breakfast.. relaxed. I wish I had a morning like that once in a while.. I didn't say anything, til tonight when he got home.. And how does he react?? Like it's my fault, and that if he had emptied the dishwasher, I would have been upset at how loud it was, and he didn't want to wake up my youngest son. Ugh!! Funny that I unloaded the dishwasher, and loaded it while he slept..
It's not like I don't want to be doing these things.. It's because I shouldn't be! I hate to use the pregnancy card.. which I think he thinks I do.. If I'm not getting my way, I'll just remind him that I'm pregnant with twins.. I did mention what my day was like yesterday, having contractions and what not.. Does he think I like feeling like this? I sure as hell don't want to have to depend on him, he's the only person I know that isn't being supportive, and he's the one who should be the most.
Whatever. I'm sure I'll feel differently when he apologizes later..
So, then I come to work, my haven.. and I can relax for a bit.. and get my head in a better place.. I ran into our housekeeper.. the language barrier.. And she's smiling at me as I'm waddling down the hallway, and she says "Oh, xianfern getting so FAT" WTF????? I don't care about the language barrier.. who says that to a pregnant woman??? Anyway, I'm heading home in a few.. going to bed.. and trying to forget this day ever happened!!

Monday, May 29, 2006

My first false alarm..

I just got back from the hospital. I spent most of the afternoon counting contractions.. I've been having trial runs with them (aka braxton hicks) for a couple of weeks now. Today they were different, in that they were more consistent. I knew that if I had more than 4 in an hour I would have to call the dr. Which I did..she told me to hydrate myself (which I had been doing) And to call back if they continued (which they did). I went into the Family center at the local hospital, and they hooked me up to fetal monitors, and a contraction monitor. I only had a couple small ones when I was there, which is good, but of course I felt like an idiot because they weren't like the ones I was having at home. My husband was with me, he just kept saying "it's too early" or was giving me crap about the false alarm.. We both agreed though that it was better to be safe than sorry. The nurse checked my cervix, which was in perfect shape..and then sent me home. She was wonderful though and told me not to ever worry about calling, or coming back in. Twins puts me in a high risk catergory, and you can't take any chances.. So that's been my Memorial Day in a nut shell.. My husband is currently grilling chicken, and trying to stay out of my way.. he doesn't understand why I've been a tad crabby lately.. that's my senisitive artist..

Friday, May 26, 2006

I hate grocery shopping. I hate trying to decide what I might cook in the upcoming week.. or trying to remember exactly what it is that we need.. I'm not a list maker, we kind of fly by the seat of our pants..I suppose that's mistake number one.
Anyway, this really isn't about groceries, it's about running into people at the grocery store. We shop at Market Basket, despite all the upscale shops in our town like Stop N Shop or Shaws.. all located within a mile of each other. I shop at the basket basically because it's a lot cheaper, and I rarely run into people that I know.. rarely. But there's always that occasion that I turn a corner, and there is someone from your past, walking in your direction. Some of these people are comfortable with ignoring the fact that they know you. I appreciate this most times. Then there are the people who's mouths drop and can't believe that they are seeing me.. big deal..I'm here every Sunday.. This past Sunday, I saw a guy I used to go to high school with. He was our class president. Anyone reading this who went to school with me knows who I'm talking about.. He was a nice enough guy.. kind of a dork, but never lacked school spirit. This guy had enthusiasm like I've never seen. He was really into school pride, and school politics..It was rather frightening. So, this one I could have walked by, and hoped that he would decide to just walk by me too, without acknowledging anything.. But of course, he wasn't going to ignore one of his former high school "subjects". The whole family was there, and he had to make unusual gestures with his hands about the kids, and my belly.. blah blah. Then he had to point down the aisle at a woman with a shopping carriage. She was a cute little blond.. looked nice enough, and I was informed that that was his wife, and that they were married in October! Wow! congratulations.. that IS exciting.. Our class president finally got laid! And then got married.. or vice versa!!
He said he's got some catching up to do (like with how many kids I had..) I didn't spill the beans about there being twins in my belly.. it would have pushed him over the edge with enthusiasm.. and we didn't want to do that!
We wrapped up our very quick conversation and got on with our shopping.. Of course I run into him again in the next aisle, where he says as I'm walking by "Are you xianfern or christhadasister" Hmmm.. still can't tell me apart from my own twin.. Can't say that I blame him.. but if I was going to strike up a conversation with someone, I can safely say that I wouldn't do it unless I was sure of who they were!

When a turd is born..

One of the many things that I just love about pregnancy, is the constipation that comes with it. I don't even know why I'm sharing this, but what the hell.. this is not for the weak stomached.. or the poopaphobs.. Yesterday turned out to be an eventful day on the shitter for this pregnant lady. I went in thinking it was just a good ole number 1, which was all I had time for as I was leaving for work soon. Like many surprises, it just came out of nowhere.. you know, that urge.. So there I am.. waiting. I'm not one of those poopers that can just poop, I have to "work it up" if you catch my drift.. So, I'm working it up, and jesus, it's going to be a doozy! And it was.. nothing like making a friend for the hemmorhoid that you already have! (Lovely huh?)
This isn't the worst of it though.. although that was pretty bad having to give birth to a turd, it wasn't nearly as bad as the blood vessel that errupted just above my eye near my brow. Can anyone believe that I am typing this?? ugh. There it was though, this small red line right below my eyebrow.. another treasure that I've been rewarded with throughout this pregnancy! I can't wait for what's next.. maybe I'll get a matching one on my other eye next time!! Don't worry, I'll keep you all posted!!

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

New camera..

I got a new camera for Mother's Day, and have finally figured out how to hook it up to my pc. All by myself I might add.. here's a few pics..

Here are my boys, who gave me my new camera... the little one is certainly into getting his picture taken, huh?

I don't know who that cow is.. but I think she's carrying twins, and this is her at 26 weeks.. How is she going to get 14 more weeks in?? She's looking pretty stretched as it is!!

Here's my husband fixing the haircut my oldest son got at Supersluts. Looks like this is going to be how the boys get haircuts in the future..

My oldest son has started tee ball. It's the cutest thing watching him skip from base to base.. I don't even konw where the ball is in this picture..I'm guessing he's going to be our artistic one!

And finally, the two people that I love more than anything in the whole world.. Despite the way they drive me crazy and depend on me endlessly for bum wiping, nose bleeding, bug killing and pretty much everything else under the sun.. they're still the best!!

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

My husband got the call from the school last night. He didn't get the job. Which is totally fine.. but of course he was feeling like a loser. Fortunately, he found out from his sister who works in the SAU office, that they gave it to someone who already works in the school. This made him feel a lot better, they knew before they even started interviewing that the job was going to this person. It was basically just a formality, they had to interview other people even though they knew who was getting it. It happens all the time.
In other news.. my oldest son is home today.. he woke up with a nasty cough and we've decided he could take a day to rest. And what is he doing right now?? Playing transformers with his brother..hardly restful! Tomorrow he's going to feel fine.. they're having a Grandparents Luncheon tomorrow at his school, and he can hardly wait. My mom, and mother in law are going for some cafeteria style American chop suey.. yum! They'll be happy just to get to sit with him, and see him in his school environment.
On Thursday I'm going for my glucose tolerance test at my ob's. I've always passed it, so I'm sure this time will be no different. I don't look forward to the nasty drink that I'll be consuming.. or the blood draw. My youngest son is going to be with me, I'm sure that he'll handle it just fine. He's been with me to the chiropractor twice, and if he can sit through watching his mother get adjusted, then a little needle won't scare him away. I'm also having another ultrasound.. they discovered last week that both the girls are breech. Although I'm told they still have room to move. I can't imagine that being true though.. they are both 14 inches long and weigh 2.5 lbs. I'm guessing any rolling around is pretty much out of the question.. but we'll see. I know they have about 3 weeks or so to get into their final position until birth.. I've been having a terrible pain under my left rib for quite some time, which I've discovered was the baby's head hitting me in the ribs- the one who had been breech for some time. Now I've got the pain under both of my ribs, with both their heads just bobbing underneath. It sometimes feels as though the flesh is raw.. it sucks..
Ok, enough complaining.. Now I have to get some laundry done around the house.. that way I'll feel a lot less guilty when I lay down on the couch for my mid morning "rest"..

Monday, May 22, 2006

My husband had his job interview last week. He looked so cute dressed in his shirt/tie/sweater/and tweed jacket.. I don't think he ended up wearing all of the clothes because it was going to be in the 70's that day, and sweating during the interview might not be the best impression you want to make.
He thinks it was a terrible interview, and that he screwed it up- but if you knew him, you would expect him to say such things. I'm sure he did just fine. There's something very reassuring about talking to him. He's a great teacher, and very talented artist, plus the principle knows him there, so he's got a few things going in his favor. He'll find out this week if he gets it or not. They were interviewing 8 other people..
So, I heard from my dutch friend amvdk.. It was so nice to finally connect with her. She sent a picture of herself and her two children. They of course are beautiful blond haired/blue eyed cuties. And she looks exactly the way I remember her from 17 years ago.. She claims that I haven't changed either.. I just love friends like that!!
Well, I'm off to take the kids's windy and a bit cold, but the boys are getting restless.. and I need to run them down a bit!!

Sunday, May 21, 2006


My husband got an email this morning from someone I knew 17 years ago.. She was a foreign exchange student from the Netherlands (her initials are amvdk) And I haven't heard from her in over a decade. I was thrilled that she found us, and have since sent an email updating her on a few important details.
Amvdk was the most fun, and funniest person. She truly made my sister and I's junior year of high school quite memorable. I wonder how we lost touch over the years, although it's pretty easy to do I suppose. Thankfully, with the help of the internet, and search engines, she was able to locate me. Now I'm just waiting to hear about what's been going on with her. I also sent her my blog address, so she might be able to do some more catching up here..
Anyway, I only have a minute.. we're heading out soon to a graduation cookout for our niece.. But if you're reading this amvdk, we've all missed you!! Hope to hear from you soon!

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Had some company today..

We had some company today after school. Our neighbor's kid, who is the same age as my oldest came running over right after my son got off the bus.. Slightly annoyed because I was ready to go back inside and lay down for a bit.. but whatever, my son was thrilled to have her over, and I thought it would be ok for a few minutes.. But then she got bored with our swingset, and the next thing I know, my son is telling me that he's going over to her house.. um, ok. But come back in a little bit. I should have said no.. what the hell? I'm the parent.. But I quickly came up with something to do, and went over to get him. He was on their swingset (which is one of those metal ones.. yuck, not a nice wood one like ours.. but whatever..)
So, we left, and brought some lovely lilacs to one of my co-workers (her favorite flower, and we have a ton in our yard) Then I brought them for a haircut. We went to supersluts again.. while I love the place I go, they don't take debit cards and I didn't have cash or my checkbook on me. Anyway, they look very handsome with their new doo's, and they are just tickled because they got a lollipop. And who do we see running across the yard when we get home?? Our little neighbor.. great! This is the kid who's mom had asked me if I could babysit her this summer.. I hadn't heard anything back from her.. but apparently, she's found a way for me to babysit no matter what! When I told my son he had to come in for dinner, she asked if she could come too. I had to tell her to go home.. I'm not sure if I'm quite down with her, she seems like trouble.. I just hope she doesn't make this a daily thing.. but I'm thinking she might.. lord help me!

Friday, May 12, 2006

I'm feeling so much better, thank you..
I went to the half doctor yesterday, mainly because I could barely walk and I wasn't sure if I was going to get to see the Reiki Master. He did an adjustment on my hips, and the arch in my left foot. It's no secret how I feel about feet, so I was floored when he told me to take off my shoe and sock.. ick. Of course I wasn't prepared (hairy legs, clammy feet..) But he promised me he didn't care.. I believed him.. afterall he's a professional, and I'm sure he's had worse looking feet! Soon after I made the appt with the 1/2 dr., the Reiki Master called, and I went to see her today. It was an amazingly relaxing hour.. she has a massage table in her tiny apartment, which I laid on- in total comfort I might add! And she just moved her hands over me.. and I almost fell asleep. All she wanted in return was a pound of coffee from Dunkin Donuts! Talk about a good trade!
She want's me to come back in a couple of days.. Not a problem!
In other news.. My husband has a job interview next week.. He loves the job he has, but the pay in this district is way better.. and seeing as how we're becoming such a huge family soon.. the extra money will be extremely helpful! The only problem is that there are a ton of applicants. He has an advantage in that the art teacher who is leaving, gave him a letter of reference (he did his student teaching with her) And his sister works for the SAU so he gets the scoop on pretty much anything going on. I think he said there were about 50 applicants or so, and they are interviewing only 9. I'm just praying he gets it, but I believe that things happen for a reason, and that it'll be ok if he doesn't..
So, tomorrow is my youngest sons 3rd birthday (officially) I've been begging my oldest son not to talk about it..since the little one thought it was last week, and now he's talking about having a transformer birthday.. Ugh.. I'm thinking we'll take him out in the morning to his favorite breakfast place.. that'll be a special thing for him...
Oh, and Mother's Day.. ahh.. my day of rest.. I'm hoping.. anyone remember my mother's day last year?? I don't think he'll make that mistake again.. My son came home from school today with a gift that he made in school. It was a clay pot with something growing in it (he told me they were dandelions.. how cute!) And a book about me! It was very sweet, and of course I'm going to save it along with all the other things he's brought home from school.. My youngest son was upset that he didn't get one too.. I told him that when he's a mother someday, he can have one too! He was fine with that! That kid cracks me up!

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

I realized that I hadn't blogged about my nephew in some time.. I guess I'm trying to keep myself from thinking about how he's just wasting his life.. and making stupid decisions. Here's his plan.. He's going to go back to school in the fall (God knows where, he hasn't applied anywhere yet) He's going to live in Durham with 2 of his former roommates. He's already signed a lease and paid the down payment. Oh, this is an on campus apartment, that he can live in for 9 months, pay over $500 a month for a ONE bedroom apt. which he has to pay for in full, and have no place to park his car (he'll have to pay extra for that)
He also lost his license for 90 days last week.. This stems from his arrest at UNH back in October. So, he's begging for rides (we're pretty much refusing any help.. he can borrow my husband's bike if he's that desperate).
So, that's what's been up with him. We had originally given him until this month to have a plan together, and his shit together. We're not expecting anything at this point.. but when these babies come this summer, he's going to need to make some other plans.. We're running out of room, and this may sound harsh, but we've done all we can for him!


I've decided to try something else for my back/hip pain. As much as the half doctor helped me in the beginning, I'm afraid it's not enough. This might sound crazy, but I'm hopefully going to try Reiki. I have a friend that I used to work with that is a Reiki Master. I emailed her tonight to see if she has some time to reiki me. I told my husband about this, he kind of just looked at me like I may have been a bit nuts.. I know that "hands on healing" sounds a little bizarre, but I really believe that it works. A few years ago, after visiting the dentist, I could barely open my mouth. I've had 2 jaw surgeries that have made it near impossible to have my mouth open for extended periods of time. (this has been a big disappointment to my husband.. ewh! I know..gross!) Anyway, she performed reiki, it took about 5 minutes, and right after that, I could open wide. All she did was move her hands over my jaw. It was amazing. So, that's the direction I'm heading in. I'm only hoping that she has time, the sooner the better!!

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Just a complaint or two..

The birthday party came and went.. it went very well.. luckily we had beautiful weather, and everyone could hang outside. My boys were thrilled to show off their new swingset. For me, it was a bit of a blur. I spent so much time getting the house ready, that by the time people showed up, I just wanted to sit down, and never get up again.. which probably would have happened if I in fact had done that.. My back is absolutely killing me. I saw the half doctor last week, and he did two adjustments on me.. that seemed to help for a few hours. I don't want to complain.. but I don't know how I'm going to be able to do this til the end! I'm 25 weeks, so I could go for another 15 weeks (god help me if that happens) I could also go for 10 more weeks, and have perfectly healthy babies.. that's what I'm hoping for.. But honestly, I still have a hard time thinking about what 10 weeks is going to do to my back, and to my belly. It's so huge already! And soo very uncomfortable.
My husband is away at the moment. He's up in Pinkham Notch with the 7th grade class from his school, hiking and doing other fun outdoor crap (in the rain..) He's only going to be gone 2 nights, and I was totally up for him going. Honestly, I thought getting the bed to myself would be nice. He's got this habit of intentionally, or unintentionally waking me up to tell me that I'm snoring. I can't help it (obviously) and generally, he just leaves and goes into one of the boys rooms. If he did that without having to tell me that I was snoring, it would make my night so much more uninterrupted. Anyway, last night was the first night he was gone, and of course I ended up sharing my bed with the boys. My oldest is still reeling from seeing a bug in his room 2 nights ago, and couldn't bear to be in there by himself. So, either I listened to the sobbing or just let him sleep with me. One would have been manageable, but when the 3 year old wakes up screaming hours later.. well, of course he ends up in the family bed..kicking me all night long.. If my husband had been home, he would have camped out on the sleeping bag next to his bed.. however, I refuse to do that anymore since I got stuck (yet again) on the floor, unable to get my fat ass up.
Well, I've said enough.. complained enough.. I've had a talk with the boys about staying in their own bed tonight.. I need some sleep.. man do I need some sleep.. Oh I could go on...

Friday, May 05, 2006

The Yes Girl..

I was coming inside this afternoon after getting my son off the bus, when I hear someone calling to me. It was my neighbor, 2 houses down. I've never met her before, but her daughter goes to school with my son, and they take the bus together. I have no idea what she wants, but I wait for her to approach us. "Do you babysit?" "Um, I used to.." kind of pointing to my protruding belly.. And she says, "Yea, I heard! Twins! Wow" Then she says, "I'm looking for someone to watch my daughter this summer" And I'm thinking.. well, you know I'm prego x2, so what help do you think I can offer.. But of course, this doesn't come out of my mouth.. Instead, what comes out, and what I can't even believe I'm saying is "Oh, I'm sure I can help you out" WHAT?? It's as if someone else has stepped into my stupid blond head, and has taken over. I don't know what personality defect I have that constantly requires me to say yes to everything.. but that's what happened. She's going to stop by with a copy of her schedule in the next few days. I'm hoping I'll have enough balls to say "gee, sorry, I don't think it's going to work out considering my condition and all.." Although, out of all that dumb blond talk, I did manage to say that I wasn't sure how long I could help her, but not for the entire summer... Ugh. I'm such a friggin idiot!! Where is my back bone when I need it????

Happy Birthday!!

Today is my oldest son's 6th birthday. He woke up at 5:30 so that I could wish him a happy birthday.. Today I volunteered in his class room, and had a great time watching him. I hadn't done this since last fall, and was so happy to see him so much more comfortable. He really is such a sweet boy, and I could tell how much the teacher enjoys him. I brought everyone a rice crispy treat (which one girl took one bite, and told me she hated it) Whatever, who doesn't like a friggin rice crispy treat?? Anyway, I was there for a few hours, and got to sing Happy Birthday to my son with the rest of the class. I'll miss this when he goes to 1st grade, I don't think they offer the same volunteering options.. I'm assuming there'll come a day when he won't want me near his school, so I'm eating up every bit of it while I can. Every time he walked by, or was close to me, he stopped to give me a hug.. It was so sweet.
Then I came home to my youngest son having an absolute melt down about some toy that my mother had gotten him... It's hard to please that one! He turns 3 next week, but as far as he knows, it's his birthday today too. I don't see the point of stretching out this exhausting celebration until next week.. We're having a cookout for them tomorrow.. Something small (only 30 or so people- that's small right??) But the weather is going to be nice, unlike last year, and I get to see a lot of my friends that I don't see that often. Everyone has been very generous in helping me out as well.. I've still got a ton to do- but it's all pretty easy stuff.. Sleeping is going to feel sooo good tonight!!