Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Monday, February 26, 2007

Eyes, and Ears..

It was a day of checking to see if things worked.. on the boys anyway. My youngest son had his hearing test today, and passed with flying colors! Apparently when I'm begging him to stop whining, he can hear me just fine.. My husband brought my oldest in for his eye test at the doctor's, and he needs glasses. A part of me feels bad, and worried about any teasing he might get at school, but another part of me can't wait to see how friggin cute he's going to look in a pair of glasses! I'm hoping that the other 1st graders will embrace him, and be a bit jealous of his new specs.. but we'll see. He only has to wear them to see the board, and things like that.. He's going to look as smart as he really is!

Friday, February 23, 2007

This made me cry tonight.. I can't imagine what their family is going through.. I am so thankful for having healthy children, but it really makes you realize that life is not fair, and that it could change in an instant..

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

My First Date..

It wasn't really a date.. I was only 9, and in the third grade.. but he was the cutest boy in class, and he asked me to go to Happy Wheels (the local rollerskating rink). I was totally giddy at the idea of going with him.. he was dark, and handsome, not so much on the tall side.. but what a cutie!
I don't remember a lot about that day in particular, I do remember scrounging up money in case he didn't pay for me.. I think his mom must have taken us..but anyway, it was pretty exciting.. That is until we got there.. We were having fun just skating around. Holding hands a little bit.. The butterflies were afluttering.. And then, from out of nowhere, during a break, he pulled me aside and offered me a cigarette. He had a carton of Marlboro Red's on him. ?? I have no idea how a boy of nine got a carton of butts, but I was totally turned off, and that was the last time we ever had any interaction. I was just terrified.

This story wouldn't be so interesting, if it didn't end like this.. The boy in this story turned out to be a semi famous rock star.. Aaron Lewis, the frontman of the band Staind. He was in true rock star fashion even at 9 years old! I always wondered what happened to him, and it wasn't until a few years ago, that I saw a video of his, and knew instantly who he was.. Good for him that his rock star ways got him somewhere!

Monday, February 19, 2007

I got a call this morning from the nurse at my son's school. In the .2 seconds that it took her to introduce herself, I mentally got everyone ready to go pick him up, and I'm thinking that he wasn't sick when he left.. I hope he's ok, all that. But she's not calling because he's sick. She's calling to tell me that he had an eye and ear screening on Friday, and didn't pass the eye part of it. She thinks his vision might be around 20/60, but she wasn't sure if he was nervous, and wanted to re-screen him. She thought getting a family history might be helpful, and did my husband or I wear glasses. We don't, but my sister later reminded me that everyone else in our families do.
I didn't hear back from her today, but my son told me that he went back to see the nurse and did the eye exam again. He said it was hard.. especially when he stood far away.. So, we'll see what comes of this. All I'm thinking of is how cute he'd look in glasses! It seems like there's always something! I guess that's what you get with 4 kids..

Sunday, February 18, 2007


I guess these are the latest craze in the first grade. They are called "webkinz". My son had to have one (he's got the monkey, because his class is called the monkey's) My youngest son got the pink poodle that he's calling "bluey".. Oh, and the monkey has been named "tutu".
Anyway, you can go to the website and adopt them, register them and play games with them.. they love it.. My youngest is currently bugging me to finish up so that he can go on line.. I love being in charge...


Here are the boys with their cousin.. my twin sister's daughter.. the red cheeks would be from all the running and screaming they did.. They're going to protect her, and she's going to teach them what it means to be a gentleman.. I'm hoping!


Saturday, February 17, 2007

He asked to wear this headband.. so that he could be part of the "band".. pretty cute!

Friday, February 16, 2007

Baby Safe Feeders..

This is the best thing for a baby to have. You can put whatever you want the babies to eat, without fear of choking. They can just mash it in between their gums, and suck out all the goodies through the mesh bag. The girls love it, and it totally occupies them for a good chunk of time, at least long enough for me to get some laundry done!

Thursday, February 15, 2007

My husband rearranged all my food cupboards last week, and I can't find anything. It's driving me a bit crazy. I know he did it to help, and somehow thought that his arrangement was easier.. but really, it's not. I haven't said anything about it, I guess when I have a minute, I'll rearrange his rearranging. Like I've got a bunch of minutes to waste doing that! sigh...
Yesterday was a snow day, so everyone was home. It allowed me to get a 30 minute nap with one of the babies, and do a bunch of laundry. Fun.
Today they had a 2 hour delay, and then I spent the remainder of my day doing more laundry and cooking dinner. Then I spent 20+ minutes at the kitchen table trying to get my youngest son to eat his dinner. Sometimes spoon feeding him is the only way to go, and he usually gets right into it, perhaps there's some regression going on there.. but whatever, it works. I gave him a bite (just a chicken and rice casserole) and he proceeded to scream, refused to chew it, and then spit it on my shoe. Why oh why am I constantly struggling with that child? That was the end of our somewhat quiet meal. His screams scared the girls who were just hanging out in their exersaucers by my chair. I had to pick them both up, and try to finish my dinner, and get the demon to stop crying. I was more pleased than usual to get to work tonight.. but tomorrow is another day, and I'm sure I'll muster up enough patience to deal with him, and hopefully he'll keep whatever he's eating inside his mouth and away from my feet!

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Sick Day..

My oldest son was home sick from school today (although he was clearly not sick by 9 a.m. when he was running after his brother trying to get him with his light saber..) My youngest son was thrilled to have his big brother home to play with him, but like anything in life, too much of something isn't always a good thing, and too much time together gets those boys on each other's nerves in a big way! Most of the afternoon was spent with the boys running to me to tell on the other one. I heard a lot of "You're not the boss of me" from my oldest, and a lot of "He won't play with me" from my youngest. I was a frazzled mess by the time my husband got home..
The girls were great, they were just enthralled by watching the boys interact with each other. It really is quite a sight! But here I am at work.. looking forward to another day of all the kids being home.. looks like we're going to get nailed with quite a big storm. The best part is that since my husband is a teacher, he'll be home to help out! He didn't seem too thrilled about the prospect of that.. but oh well.. welcome to my world honey!

Monday, February 12, 2007

Just a few things..

The weekend flew by, like they always do. I did manage to get some "me" time on Saturday night. I went over to my sister's house, and hung out with her, her husband and my niece for a while.. it was a welcome break! Another welcome break came in the form of my sister taking the boys over to her house on Sunday to sled and play on the ice (they live on a river..) It was great to see them get out and have some fun, and to just take care of the girls.
Today I made an appointment for my youngest son to have a hearing test. The therapists at the school recommended it to rule out any hearing issues that may be hindering his speech.. So, they had a cancellation and could see us today. Fine. My mother in law came over to get my oldest son off the bus, and I took the girls with me. Heaven forbid I leave them for a second.. Well, I should have. They were ok, but needed to be held (as always) and my 3 year old saw what was expected of him, and freaked out. They wanted him to get into a sound proof booth, a rather dark one, and listen to some lady that he couldn't see. Yea, right! I should have known that I had bitten off much more than I could chew, but with 4 kids, and my mom out of commission to babysit, I had to bring the girls. I could have gone into the booth with him, had I not been with the babies.. great! And the nice audiologist says "didn't they tell you that when you booked the appointment?" No, but of course I didn't tell them I was coming with a litter of kids either.
So anyhoo, I've got an appointment for after his speech eval, which does nothing for us.. I'm going to try and find another place to go. Jeez.. I'm exhausted from reliving this here in my blog! I won't even get into the fact that I used the valet at the dr's office, and the guy almost drove off with one of the babies.. Apparently he thought I was done unloading! Or, forgetting all the baby bags in my car too (including my purse), I was too flustered after almost getting my kid parked with my car that I just spaced it.
One last thing.. I decided last night that instead of listening to my husband whine about how tired he was, that I was going to sleep in the girl's room, and get up with them so that he could sleep.. I blew up our air mattress which fit just perfectly in between their cribs (it's a rather small modest bedroom..) It would have been fine, if there wasn't an apparent slow leak in the mattress that as the night wore on, the bed just got bouncier. I couldn't move without practically launching one of the babies off of it. And it was sooo cold! I guess air doesn't stay warm.. Needless to say I won't be doing that again..
Well, I'm here at work, and I wish I could just lay my head down.. I have another appointment at the school on Wednesday, but it looks like we might get a bunch of snow.. I'm ok with that. I'd rather lay low anyway.. I think I need a vacation.. maybe from my life.. maybe for a week or so..

Friday, February 09, 2007

Separation Anxiety..

The girls are going through some pretty serious separation anxiety. I can't leave the room without them totally freaking out. It's made my day a bit noisier, as I occasionally do have to go from one room to the next, and can't always carry them with me. I remember this with the boys, but of course carrying them around was a lot easier.

One is napping, and the other one is in the baby carrier on my lap as I type. Heaven forbid I turn my back for more than 2 seconds!

So, it's Friday, and I'm feeling a bit of separation anxiety myself. My husband is going out tonight, with a friend to see a band in Portsmouth. Tomorrow he has band practice.. so I'll be a single parent most of the weekend. I'm trying to be supportive, and I understand that he needs an outlet.. but damn, so do I! I didn't mind his band playing when we were in our 20's.. and had no children. I found it quite entertaining to go see him play (the couple of times that he did) I thought it was actually quite sexy.. But not so much anymore.. First of all, they aren't playing anywhere but some guys basement, and second, what's sexy about a bunch of guys in their late 30's jamming without lyrics, a singer?

This is not to say that my husband isn't sexy, but the things that make him sexy to me now are different than when we were young.. his ability to be a good father, and provide for his family.. the fact that he's not only an art teacher and musician, but a self taught carpenter as well..That's sexier than anything to me. But here I am.. with 4 kids to myself all weekend.. so that he can fulfill his needs.. I say that makes me pretty damn sexy myself!

6 months..

Yesterday was the first time that I've had to buy diapers for the girls. My friends and family have kept me stocked up for a full 6 months!! Thank you all!

Thursday, February 08, 2007

I had my meeting with the special ed team at the school today. It went really well, and besides the fact that I don't think those people see much laughter at their job (I knocked em dead, had them rolling on the floor!) I don't think they move too fast either. My son will have all the testing required and I'll go back to meet with them at the end of March.. my dream of getting him into preschool might not happen til next fall.. But at least I'm on the right track, and hopefully he'll be getting the help he (and me) so desperately need.
I brought one of the twins with me, the one who always gets to come with me because apparently she can't bare to be away from me. She was amazing (if I do say so myself!) She just sat in her stroller and played with her bottle the entire hour! I also got to pick my oldest son up in his classroom. He was surprised, and quite excited to see me there. All of his classmates came running over to see the baby.. and every one of them tried touching her.. but I was pretty good keeping the little paws off of her, and no one cried when I yelled at them.. kidding..
Anyway, I'm tired.. but what the hell else is new? I'm getting tired of complaining about it, but I have to say I've never known fatigue like this before.. One of the people at the meeting today has a set of twins who are 10. We were talking briefly about sleep deprivation and she said you can really get used to it.. I haven't found that to be true yet. I'm one of those people that really need sleep, and functioning on less than 7 or 8 hours is difficult, if not impossible. I know it'll go by fast, and if it doesn't kill me, then it will only make me stronger! Or some kind of crap like that..

We Suck..

I'm feeling like a total failure as a parent because I can not, for the life of me, let those babies cry it out.. ugh. It really sucks! I'm so tired, and cranky, and this winter weather is pissing me off..

I'm really trying to be positive about the situation, I know it won't last forever. But that's little consolation at 2 in the morning when I've just gotten one back to sleep (on the breast of course) and the other one wakes up right as I'm about to doze back to sleep.. I'm not blind to the fact either that I'm creating this. That if I had more of a backbone, and didn't feel so completely guilty when I hear them cry, that maybe we'd be on a better road.. But I suck at that, and so here I am.

February vacation is when things will change.. At least that's how I'm fighting it now. My husband will have a week off, and although he doesn't know this yet, he's going to be getting up with them. He has to. One of us has to be strong, and I'm thinking the one without the boobs should have to get them back to sleep.! Right?

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

It's like a slap in the face..

I've been watching Lost faithfully since day 1.. through all the stupid shit they've done on that show (killing the cute guy Boone, putting a polar bear on the island..etc) Even when I found out that they were going on hiatus for most of this years season, I still thought, that's ok, I'll watch it.. I'll be the loyal fan that I am.. Until now.

I'm guessing if they haven't totally lost all respect, and most of their fans, this might do it.. 10pm? Oh come on now! Some of us need to sleep, and get up early, and deal with 4 kids all day! Who can stay up that late? On a week night no less.. So, that's it for me. No more Lost.. no more finding out who Kate really loves.. (like I give a rats ass..) Or what's up with the "others" or with Locke, or Michael.. where did he go? Ugh.. So many unanswered questions that I'll have to find out other ways instead of watching the show.. Remember when it first started? It was on at 8!


Someone my husband works with gave us a bunch of baby food. I thought that was a very nice gesture.. too bad it's going to go to waste.. over half of it was this shit right here.. Veal and veal gravy.. Um, no thanks.. I'm not giving my babies pureed baby cow.. if I won't eat it, then neither will they.

Monday, February 05, 2007


I spent my day Sunday finally answering a question I've pondered for quite some time "What would it be like to be sick with 4 kids?"
Well, it sucked.
I wasn't vomiting sick, or crapping every 2 minutes sick, it was just your basic general malaise. I couldn't do much standing because it hurt my head, and I had the chills, and body aches.. All those things that render you pretty much useless.. But being mom to 4 kids, 2 of whom completely rely on you, makes the hours go by like days, and the day itself drone on endlessly.
But I'm better now, in fact I was pretty much better by the end of the day. It was weird, but I'm thankful that I didn't have to force my husband to stay home with me on Monday.. that would have been way too much for him!! By Sunday night he's usually dreaming of all the snot nosed, back talking, ill mannered kids at his school, and counting the minutes until he can be with them again!

Friday, February 02, 2007

Dumb Da Dumb Dumb Dumb...

There's a new person at work..and when I say new, I mean she's been here since November, so she's not that new. I don't usually blog about people I work with for fear of them finding it..and honestly, I like the people I work with a lot, and most of them read my blog anyway.. but this woman has no idea about it, and would never find it anyway, she couldn't find her way out of a paper bag, ya know? One of those! Thankfully, I don't have to work with her much. She's nice enough, but sometimes nice just isn't enough..
Here's how she files papers.. There are only 2 drawers in our filing cabinet. When you go and file things, you have a bunch of papers, you look to see where one is, and you put it in the correct slot, look at the other one, and so on.. Well, if you're her.. you take one paper, open the drawer, file it, close the drawer, look at another paper, open the same drawer, file it, and repeat this process until you've filed everything. Normal people, would keep the drawer open.. right? This nonsense of opening and closing.. and opening and closing.. what the hell is that about?? And if she has a question to ask you (which she always does) she needs you to come over to her desk. So she'll come over to yours "You got a minute?" And then walk you back to her desk, turning her head every few feet like you're 5, making sure that you're still coming. One of these times, I'm going to dash off to the bathroom, so when she turns to check and see if I'm still coming, I won't be! ugh.. time to stop hiring people because they have a pulse!

Thursday, February 01, 2007

To Ween or Not to Ween..

In an effort to try to get more sleep, I've been thinking of weening the girls from breastfeeding. They're 6 months old, and really only nurse before bed, and first thing in the morning. Oh, and all night! It's not the easiest decision for me to make.. I really enjoy nursing them, and I kind of feel like this will be the end of something, an era maybe.. at least in my own pathetic mind!
I've nursed my kids a total of 5 1/2 years! I don't have to mention the shape my boobs are in (which would be no shape, what so ever) I also hate to think of letting this free milk just dry up, since formula is so expensive. I've thought about pumping, but there's that time issue.. and the fact that I don't have any! I guess I thought that if I stopped nursing, then maybe they would sleep better.. you know, knowing that there wasn't any good boobie juice waiting for them.. so they might as well sleep. My husband thinks I just need to not nurse them when they wake up, I agree, but it's hard when they associate you with milk, and know that under your shirt is what they're waiting for, and why they're awake, and what the hell is wrong with you for not giving it to me!! Followed by a lot of screaming.. and quite frankly, I'm too tired to fight it, and I always give in.. It sucketh in a big way.. I guess I'm going to have to think about it a bit.. I feel guilty in a way, stopping this soon.. the boys were 18 months, and 2 1/2.. I know it's different, and that they weren't nursing at the same time.. honestly, I'd miss the convenience, the lack of effort it takes to just pull out your boob, and the comfort it provides for them.. Maybe I'll just sleep on it.. hah! If I ever get to sleep again!! I said good night to my husband last night and he said "I doubt it"