Thursday, June 29, 2006

Can you see the babies??

This is twin B.. if you look closely, you'll catch a glimpse of her nose, mouth, lips and eyes.. the bottom picture has her little finger near her nose..

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Our trip to the city...

It was a long day.. it started at 4 a.m. when my oldest son woke me up (for about the 3rd time) to tell me that my bed was just so much more comfortable than his, and couldn't he come in for a snuggle.. course I let him.. I can never turn down a snuggle with one of my boys! Unfortunately, that was when my day started. I couldn't turn off my brain, and it just went ahead planning my very busy day despite the fact it knew that I was never going to make it through starting so early. My son never went back to sleep either, and by 5 we were both down stairs hanging out in the dark living room..
My husband and I dropped the boys off at his brother's house, we had our appt. with the pediatric urologist at Childrens Hospital in Boston at 10:30. They were thrilled to be getting to spend the day with their cousin, and to get out of the house. The drive in was much easier than I imagined. I drove because my husband is a terrible driver, and I'm a worse passenger. We parked and made our way to the hospital. I knew going that I was going to be saddened just by being there, seeing kids in wheelchairs, sick with many different illnesses. I think that's one thing that I just can't handle, sick children.. Anyway, we found our way through the maze of corridors to where we needed to be and waited our turn for an ultrasound. With my other boys I only had 1, maybe 2 ultrasounds. I can honestly say, that I've lost count with how many ultrasounds I've had with the girls so far. But today's ultrasound was by far the best, in the technological sense. We got a couple of 3-D pictures of one of the babies- of her face.. it was amazing. The other baby wasn't as cooperative and was facing my back making it impossible to image. I was happy enough though just to get to see a glimpse of the face that I'm going to soon fall in love with. It was unreal! She's a cutie (of course) and has the markings of her daddy's side of the family (a.k.a. the good smooshing nose!!)
But here's where we stand.. baby A has moderate to severe hydronephrosis, but they still can't tell exactly what's causing it, whether it's a blockage or reflux.. They are however, not worried, and tell us that we shouldn't be either. They'll monitor her some more, I'm scheduled for another appt. down there in a month.. if I haven't had them already.. and they'll do some further testing when she's a month old or so.. It's basically all good, and they definitely know what they are doing down there.
We were there almost 3 hours, and after emptying my bladder before the trip home, and validating our parking, we were on our way. We rode the elevator with a boy who was about the same age as my oldest son. He wore a mask, and his head was sparsely covered by thin whisps of hair. He was with his mom, grandfather, and his baby brother, whom he pushed in the stroller. His mother was careful not to let him touch anything, reminding him how dirty everything was.. It made me so sad to see this little boy like that. And so grateful at the same time that my children are as healthy as they are..

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Assaulted at Daycare...

This is what happened to my precious little niece on one of her first days at a new daycare. The place that she goes to is nice, and seriously, for the price my sister pays, it had better be. I know how kids her age can be, they're really still babies..but none the less, you hate to hear that someone you love got pushed around by some punk in her class..
I guess my petite little 16 month old niece was standing in line with the rest of the other kids to go outside. Funny to imagine her still at all since she is one curious pup.. But anyway, she had her binky in her mouth (or pacifier, nuk, whatever you want to call it) when one of her "friends" comes up and tries to get it out of her mouth, and in the process gives her 4 scratches in the face. I'm sure my niece must have had a good cry over that one, who wouldn't? The teachers sent home an incident report, saying she had 2 scratches, even though it was 4.. I felt so bad for my sister.. her poor little baby.. Of course I was hoping that they would include the name and address of the little kid who did this to her.. her "friend" as they stated in the report.. Of course I'm over reacting.. this kid who took the binky was probably just missing his own, and why not take it from this cute little thing..
I'm sure that she'll get one or two more of those reports.. I wonder if the kid who scratched her got one sent home too.. I should hope so!!

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Getting back to normal..

As normal as I can be I guess... And by "normal" I mean getting back to doing some things around the house, dishes, laundry etc.. As helpful as my husband has been, things are not done on the same level of cleanliness as when I do them myself. He'll load the dishwasher, but leave huge pots and pans in the sink. He'll make lunch for the boys, but leave crumbs everywhere.. He does the laundry, but I can't stand the way he folds the towels! How anal am I?? I am glad that he's picking up some of the slack. He really is trying his hardest. Unfortunately he's married to a former house cleaner whose standards could never be met by anyone..
He's at soccer tonight, I was feeling as though I could take care of the boys on my own. They'll be in bed soon, and so will I. Somewhere in the midst of all this drama, we decided we'll start looking for a new place to live again. This is what my husband does to me every 6 months or so. He'll get online and find some nice places, that we think we can afford, and we'll go see one of them, fall totally in love with it.. and try to figure out what our next step will be. That's what happened yesterday. I spent far too much time on my feet, walking around this house, but I absolutely loved it. We're going to take our time and think about it.. and see some other places. Right now I just want to get through the next 2 months or so.. and be happy where we are.
I'm waiting for next weekend.. it's the camping trip! I'll have the house to myself, and some much needed rest, uninterrupted!! I just hope it doesn't rain.. Ok, I have some kids to bath.. and get to bed!!

Friday, June 23, 2006

When it feels like the real thing...

I spent Wednesday night in the hospital, on an i.v. getting shots of terbutatline, a drug intended to help stop contractions (among other things). I got a taste of what labor with these girls could be like. It wasn't like anything I went through with the boys.. It was actually quite painful, and damn scary. I know I've been doing a lot of complaining about wanting this pregnancy over with, but after going through what I did, I definitely do not want it this early. I'm almost 32 weeks, and they would most likely be fine, but it's a scary risk to take.
Anyway, I spent the night there, getting woken up every 2 seconds by the roughest nurse I've ever met.. She was ok in times when I needed her to be, but when she got so frustrated that the babies wouldn't stay still for her monitor and she jokingly called them brats.. well, lets just say that I wanted the hell out of there! Luckily the other nurses made up for her seemingly lacking bed side manner.
I met with an ob today, the one who had been treating me Wednesday night, and she took me off the temporary bed rest I had been put on. I haven't had a contraction since I got home, and the shots of terbutaline are available in pill form, and I have to take them for at least a week. They suck. They make my heart race, and give me a slight case of the shakes.. But I'm not complaining.. I don't think I'm going to complain ever again!!!
Well, I'm off to lay down again, that seems to be the only thing I can do that doesn't make me feel like I might get sick. ugh.. was that a complaint?? sorry.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006


I'm trying to come up with a new name for my blog.. since raising 2 kids in nh is going to be a huge lie soon.. I was thinking "Four and No More", or maybe just simply "WTF" I don't know.. but I'm up for suggestions.. anyone, anyone??

Monday, June 19, 2006

I am officially done babysitting! Yea.. I was not in the least bit sad about it either.. it's been a long time coming. I had only been watching my 2 year old niece for 2 days a week, but it's still nice to be done with that and just have to deal with my own children. That's enough in itself.
I saw my o.b. this afternoon. She's going to be squeezing me into her schedule so that I won't have to wait til my 37th week to see her again. I was relieved. She also discussed more about the position of the babies, and what it means to me.. basically it means c-section. This isn't how I wanted to go, but at this point, I don't care if they have to coax them out with a carrot on a string, ya know? I'm just sick of being pregnant.. and totally uncomfortable.
My dr did seem a bit alarmed that the neonatologist that did my ultrasound on Friday is sending me down to Children's Hospital before the babies are born. Usually they wait, but it may be because the fluid in her kidney had doubled since my last ultrasound a month ago.. She didn't want me to be alarmed if they suggested that I have the babies down there either. She said it's a possibility depending on what the urologist finds. I go down there next Wednesday the 28th. I'm sure it'll be fine.. I'm still not worried.. not yet anyway..

Friday, June 16, 2006

Hydro what???

I had my monthly ultrasound today. First let me start by saying, they are growing well, each of them weigh about 3.5-4 lbs. which is more baby than I've ever carried before, and I don't know how my body is going to take 9 more weeks of this growing. They are still both breech (total pisser!!) The tech told me not to lose hope, that they could change position, and that if they did, I wouldn't doubt for a second when it was happening.. great, more pain! When the tech was doing my ultrasound, she said "ouch" Yea, ouch for me, their position is such that they are more at an angle, with their heads up under my right breast, facing my back. Kicking the shit out of me!
The neonatologist always comes in after the tech has done the pictures, and goes over everything with me. They've been watching baby #1 closely the past 3 months or so for some fluid on her kidneys. It's been nothing that was too alarming, except that today she saw the fluid had pretty much doubled since I was there last. It's called hydronephrosis, and isn't all that uncommon. It's basically an obstruction in one of her ureters which is what joins the kidney to the bladder. This obstruction is not allowing urine to go to the bladder, and basically gets stuck in the kidney, and makes it stretch. She's sending me to Children's Hospital in Boston to see a pediatric urologist. The worst case scenario is that she could lose her kidney eventually if the damage is severe. I really don't think that's what's going to happen though. We'll definitely know more when we see the specialist- we don't have an appt. yet, but we should by Monday. It's possible that the baby will only need some anitbiotics when she's born, that could clear the obstruction.. but we'll know more, hopefully soon.
I'm really not worried about it, her other kidney is functioning just fine, so this isn't some sort of life threatening issue. I'm sure she'll be fine. I'm sure too that while I'm here at work, my husband is at home finding anything he can on the internet, and calling his own medical professional for some advice (aka his mutha!)
I see my o.b. on Monday.. I'm hoping that since these girls are breech, she'll consider scheduling my c-section, early!! We'll see...

Oh Britney..what the hell where you thinking??

I don't know if anyone caught the interview last night with Britney Spears..but wtf was she thinking? It looked as if the whole reason for the interview was damage control. She's been in the tabloids now forever, and not in a favorable light. It seemed like a smart move to be on with the squeaky clean Matt Lauer, and try to address everything the public has heard lately. Then why, oh why, would she dress like such a tramp in tight, low cut, see through maternity clothes, wear such unflattering caked on make up with too much pink it in it, slut up her hair, and chew gum through the entire interview?? The only thing I got out of the 1/2 hour that I watched was that she first needs to fire any stylist that may be helping her with her look, and get rid of the publisist who allowed her to get in front of the cameras the way she looked.
And where was kfed??? This is why I hate summer programming.. there's nothing on!! I did at least catch a re-run of My Name is Earl that I hadn't seen, and The Office.. but after that it was Britney or straight to bed.. I could only take 1/2 the show, I don't know what happened when they talked about whether she's a good mom or not, but she's definitely on her way to being the white version of Bobby and Whitney!! Lord help us!

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Why I love soccer players..

The world cup soccer thing has become quite an event in my house.. at least when my husband is home. This afternoon after school, we watched part of a game between Paraguay and Sweden. Here's what I notice.. soccer players are damn cute! I've always known that.. my husband is damn cute and has played for over 20 years. I think what makes them so cute to me is that they have what I consider to be the perfect physique. They are buff without being too buff, toned I guess..And the stamina!! Oi ve! Just imagine ladies.. if they can run up and down that field for 90 minutes... ahhhh... I was routing for Paraguay today because they had the cutest guy on their team. They lost with about 2 minutes left in the game. Last week we were watching a game (no idea who was playing) But one of the cuties had the unfortunate last name of Kaka (pronounced Kah-kah) like poop! Poor guy.. still a cutie anyway..
My husband is rooting for Portugal.. He's got some Portuguese in him, and this makes his chest puff up and get all proud of his heritage.. at least once every 4 years. I figure if I have to watch some of it sometimes, at least I can enjoy looking at all those hotties!

Cheek swab anyone??

My sister has ordered the dna testing to determine exactly what type of twins we are.. It should be here this weekend, or early next week.. I'm really excited about finding out.. to finally put an end to the story of our placenta (no one wants to hear it anymore, and I'm sick of telling it)
My sister and I both hope that we are identical.. as if this will make us closer as individuals. My mom is absolutely convinced that we're identical, her husband, and mine alike think we're fraternal. I'm guessing that we are fraternal too, only because the chances of me having twins myself are higher if you're fraternal.. It won't matter, but we can finally put to rest the story of our placenta and get on with it!!!

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

My birthday was 2 days ago. When I got into my car tonight to go to work, I found a birthday card from my husband on my front seat.. He had wished me a happy birthday (on my actual birthday), taken me out to dinner, and told me that he had forgotten my card at his school. That was fine, he's not much into cards, or sentiment.. or anything like that. But I did have to chuckle when I opened the card tonight, and saw the same old card he's gotten me at least two other times. Poor dum dum, can't remember what card he's already gotten me. I called him from the car, and thanked him for the card, and told him that I liked it even better this year!
If he hadn't personalized it with his own message to me, I probably would have cried.. but he did write that every year I get more beautiful.. awh.. that's the absolute perfect thing to tell a pregnant woman who feels like her abdomen and ass are about to explode! Even if he gets me the same card year after year, at least he's saving himself by saying something sweet!

Tuesday, June 13, 2006


My son had his last day of kindergarten today.. This school year has flown by, and it makes my heart ache a bit to see how much he's grown up since last fall. I'm so proud of how well he did, and how he adjusted so nicely. His classroom had a play today, and all the parents/grandparents and every other relative, squeezed into the room to watch them sing and act. For a bunch of 6 year olds they did very well. There was one song that they did completely in sign language it was great! My husband couldn't make it, but I videotaped most of it for him. His teacher made them all cd's with a slide show on it. There were a bunch of different events on it, from their first field trip to go apple picking, to field day just a couple of weeks ago.
I thought it was a great send off for the kids.. My son is excited about having summer vacation, and about going back and being in first grade.. It'll be interesting to see how he and his brother do having so much time together this summer.. I'm guessing there will be a lot of playing, fighting, crying.. all that fun stuff!!

Monday, June 12, 2006

What a sweet boy!

Last night my husband and I went to dinner where my nephew works, at Bonta in Hampton. I haven't been there in almost 4 years, it's a rather expensive place, and the last time I was there, I wasn't crazy about the food. But last night, yumm! It was delicious! And the best part was that it was on my nephew.. He had a gift certificate at our table when we got there for a hundred bucks! It was a combo Mother's Day gift and bday gift for my husband. Very sweet!
I've never seen him in this work environment before, and I really wasn't sure what to expect. He did an amazing job! He waited on us, and I was very impressed by his knowledge of the menu, his professionalism, and his attentiveness to us. It's safe to say that I've had plenty of experience dining out, and he ranked right up there with the best of them. I was so proud, and so touched that he was thoughtful enough to think of me at Mother's Day (I know this is a little late for Mother's day, but we had to reschedule the dinner more than once for different reasons).
It's been a while since I felt so proud of him.. and it feels really good! What a sweet, sweet boy!!

Friday, June 09, 2006


This is how I felt when I woke up last night at 3 am. Not because I was actually abandoned, but because I had my o.b. appt. yesterday, and I was scheduled for several f/u appts and couldn't get one with my own ob until the end of July.. which by the way, is when I plan on having these puppies..
Anyway, I haven't seen my own dr. in a month, and basically, I just felt like I needed to touch base with her, and go over things. She's delivered both my boys, and has been my dr for 6 years. I'm going to start having to get checked for dilation soon, and honestly, I don't need a bunch of strange hands kanoodling in my privates.. ya know?
My dr is very busy, I get it. And I'm certainly not placing any blame on her, it's the staff at the office that is having a hard time understanding why it's important for me to see my own dr every so often. So, at 3 this morning, when I couldn't sleep, and when it's quiet, and my brain won't turn off, I just started thinking about a lot of stuff.. Like the reality of having 4 kids.. holy shit.. it's really going to happen. I honestly haven't given this much thought. I know how ridiculous that sounds. I think I've just been in a sort of denial, a fog really. I know that I'm having twins, and that life is going to become busier than I ever thought possible, but when I'm awake at 3 in the morning, alone with my own thoughts.. it can get scary!
I felt differently when I woke up this morning. I had already decided sometime in the night that I was going to have to call my dr's office and insist that I see my own dr at my next visit. I was going to have to be assertive (not one of my stronger traits) When I called, and gave my schpiel to the girl on the phone, it took less than 5 seconds for her to find an appointment for me. There must have been a cancellation.. whatever, I was relieved nonetheless.
The morning also gave me a new outlook on what life is going to be like with twins. It'll be crazy, and chaotic, but it's also going to be fun. Getting to know these little monsters inside of me (and I say that with love, but man sometimes they feel like they've got weapons in there, or are having little cat fights.. not so fun) Everything works out. That's what I'm banking on!!
Here's my niece sitting with her big cousin (my youngest) look at that smile! It kills me!!

Thursday, June 08, 2006

Here are a few things your obsterician would not want you doing during pregnancy:

-heavy lifting
-running down a school bus that has driven right by your house with your child on it.

That was what I did yesterday (the running down the bus part). Every Wednesday for the past 2 months, my son has had a full day of school, which means he comes home on a different bus. And every Wednesday, he's been dropped off with no incident. Well, yesterday, as the rain relentlessly came down, I stood on my porch waiting for the school bus. I could see it come, and then I saw it go. I could see my son standing up by his seat, looking very puzzled as to why they just drove by his house.. I panicked, and started running across my yard to the next stop, about 200 feet. I didn't think about what I was doing, I was just bound and detemined to get my son off the bus, before he freaked out about that and refused to get on it anymore. Luckily, the bus driver realized what she had done, and turned it around and brought my son back. He was unscathed (surprisingly) and I was just a soaking mess, completely out of breath. My son thought he was in trouble and that she was bringing him back to the principle.
Anyway, my husband thought I should have never run, being prego and all.. but I didn't even think about that.. adrenaline took over, and somehow got my fat ass across my yard pretty quickly, all things considered.. It all worked out just fine.. I think the girls may have liked the little jaunt across the yard!!

Best Friends..

This is my son and his best friend in kindergarten. They'll be done with school next Tuesday. I remember meeting his friend the first day of school.. a warm day, and he was in a turtle neck and sweat pants! I went to school with his mom, but never really knew her. It's nice that they've become such good friends.. he's moving though, and will be in a different school next year. They'll meet up again in the 6th grade.. I'm hoping that they stay friends til then.. They get along so well, and it's nice to see my son developing friendships like he has with him...

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

This is my twin sisters daughter.. How adorable is she?? This is what I believe my girls are going to look like.. I swear their profiles on an ultrasound looked just like my niece!!

Things that go pee in the night..

I would kill at this point for just one night of uninterrupted sleep. I know my days are numbered before the babies get here, so I just long for a good solid 8 hours without my bladder or my children waking me up.
Last night was no different than any other night this past month. My oldest son arriving at our door. Apparently he decided to try a different strategy, as crawling around to my side of the bed failed him the night before. So, he just stood there, in the doorway, saying something. By the time my husband and I woke up and figured out what he was saying, it was too late. He had to go to the bathroom, REALLY bad. I don't know why he didn't just stop there on the way to our bedroom, as it is right on the way.. but of course he was scared to go in alone. We leave the light on just in case he needs to use it.. an apparent waste of electricity.
My husband got up and brought him the 3 steps to the bathroom, of course to discover he had already peed. Apparently right in our doorway. Poor kid. I do feel for him, I know it has to be such a terrible feeling to be so afraid of so much. I don't know how to cure him of this, and make him feel safe. The hardest part is trying not to lose my shit at 2 am when he's crying in his bed because he doesn't like the sound the rain makes, or because the furby on his shelf is looking at him. I'm constantly trying to make him think happy thoughts, but as he tells me, it's just too hard for him to get those bad thoughts out of his head.
The morning always brings a wonderfully happy kid who seems to have no cares in the world. It's only when the night sets in that his little brain starts thinking about all the scary, terrible things in the world. Like rain, and trees.. I'm sure he's going to grow out of this.. I just wish it was soon.. My patience is running low...

Monday, June 05, 2006

More screams in the night..

My oldest son came into our room last night, more like he snuck in. I woke up to my husband screaming (again) because he saw something moving on the floor towards my side of the bed. My poor little boy (not the one I married) started bawling. All this kid wants is a little cuddle with his mom because he's had a bad dream, and the only way he thinks he can safely make it into our room is by crawling in, past his dad. He never makes it though.. I don't know what is more traumatic for him.. having the he-be's from a nightmare, or his barely awake father losing his shit.. Most women probably feel safe having their man with them at night.. knowing that they'd be protected if a predator broke in.. I can sleep easy knowing that any predator making it up into our room would only be frightened away by the girly man shrill my husband has so mastered.. hmm..

Going to Ikea on a Rainy Day...

I wouldn't recommend it! The family and I went down on Saturday to purchase new bunks for the boys. It was a total nightmare! Unlike the first time I went down, the place was a mad house. Having my husband there with me and my children didn't allow me to browse like I normally would have. We were there for one thing, and one thing only. That still took 2 hours to accomplish with all the other shoppers in our way.. People were walking against the arrows, bumping into my kids, and my belly.. it was crazy.
My husband will never go back- which is fine with me. I can get a lot more shopping done without him. We did however get the bunkbed we wanted, which we unfortunately had to remove from it's packaging before we could fit it into the loser cruiser. It drove home propped above our kids heads.. nothing like creating your own death trap. But we did manage to make it home with enough of the day left for my husband to set them up, and get the boys into them at a reasonable hour. Of course it ended up being a long night, with everyone a tad freaked out by the new situation.. We're trying to get the babies room in order.. I could have them any day you know!! But I doubt it.. Yesterday we went looking for paint for the girls room. I don't know why my husband cares what color it is, but he does. I want a nice subtle light purple, very light. He wants a nice cream color.. We might as well paint it white! Couldn't I have the last say in something??? Why does he care??

Friday, June 02, 2006

I got my blood work back, and it turns out that I am anemic, quite anemic in fact! The nurse who called told me to start taking 2 iron pills a day. They recommended one that would hopefully not make my whole pooping dilema any worse. The more I think about it, the more outraged I become.. I told them I thought I was anemic almost 10 weeks ago! But no one would do a blood test on me. Unfortunately, I could have just started taking iron pills on my own, but the fact is, I don't like taking stuff that I haven't been told to take for one, and secondly, I didn't want to make my pooping any worse.. It was a no win situation.. I'll just have to accept the fact that the past 10+ weeks that I've been so exhausted, suffering with headache's, and lightheadedness are just a loss, and I'll try to be thankful that they're over! I'm also hoping that the iron is going to give me some more energy. I'm so tired of being SO TIRED!!
In other news.. cause there's always "other news" with me.. I'm waiting for our pediatricians office to open this morning so that I can call and get some advice on what to do with the egg shaped lump my youngest son has on his temple. He was playing with his brother yesterday, and he fell right into my death trap of a coffee table, and banged the side of his head (his temple) right into the wrought iron handle. What started as an indent of the handle has now turned into a huge swollen mess. He looks like Alfred E. Newman, you know how he has that big head?? Anyway, I'm sure he's fine. He slept ok, and he says it doesn't hurt..however, he's 3 and unfortunately I can't go on his word.. I think that's about the extent of the excitement in my house.. at least for now..