My great grandmother

I had the strangest dream last night about my great grandmother. We called her Memere (pronounced mem-may). She was 100 when she died. I was only 19. She lived with my grandmother who was my most favorite person in the world. In fact, she still is. She's the one that the medium said walked with me, I totally believe she does and it gives me such a huge sense of peace. Anyway, we're not talking about my grammie, but her mother in law, Memere.
Memere was 80 when my sister and I were born. There's a picture of us with Memere when we were about 2. We were outside, something I never saw her do, or at least when I was old enough to remember it. My sister and I were in our diapers, and a small plastic pool was in the background. Memere was sitting in an aluminum lawn chair, and we're on either side, leaning in.  I am sure that she must have been propped up out there so that my grandfather (her son) could get a picture of the toe headed twins, with their great grandmother.
She used a walker, and walked from her chair in the living room, to the bathroom, back to her chair, which is where she sat, pretty much for 2 decades.  My sister and I spent A LOT of time at my gram's house. Memere had lived with my grandparents for most of her life, and my grandmother did everything for her. She had a commode (her "potty") that she used every night, and that my grandmother cleaned every morning. I hated that thing! My gram would come through the living room with it and we would all hold our breath. There are certain smells that are so bad and so foul, that they leave a memory with you. You can actually smell them again just by imagining it. That shit bucket is one of those smells.  
In my dream last night, I was at my grandmother's house. I dream a lot about that house, and particularly of my grandmother. But last night, for the first time in maybe ever, I dreamt about Memere. Her bedroom was off of the living room. It was tiny. However, it seemed appropriate for a woman who was so small and frail. She needed very little,  she had a twin bed, a bureau, a nightstand, pictures of Jesus everywhere, holy water, and of course, her shit bucket.  The house was not as it usually is. My grandmother wasn't there, and it was cold and gray. Completely dreary. I was alone at this point, walking through the house looking for someone, for anyone really, and it occurred to me that we had forgotten about Memere. I ran to her room and flew the door open. I found her there, looking like her brain had taken a nap,  and oddly, covered in her own feces. She told me that the potty hadn't been emptied in ages and that I had better take care of it. It was overflowing and there was shit everywhere..ironically, it didn't smell. The nice minister type priest dude (who apparently I was having an "emotional affair" with, but were going to take it up a notch and cuddle)   picks up the shit bucket, covered in pooh, and all I can think is  "dude, we are not cuddling now" and then Memere starts flinging pooh at us..
That's pretty much the bulk of the dream..with Memere appearing out of nowhere throwing huge pieces of shit at anyone, and everyone. She was apparently pretty pissed that we forgot her. Maybe she "walks" with me too..although, if she did, I'm pretty sure I could smell her a mile away!

Falling...

It's funny when someone falls right? I don't care if it's me, or you, or anyone, it's just fricking funny! My kids, and my husband as well, think I'm insane and sadistic for finding this amusing. When my mom fell a few years back when she was working at the homedepot, I begged her to try to get the surveillance video..she got caught up in some netting in the garden center and landed on her face. Literally. She broke her nose, her finger (which required pinning) and her collarbone. Yet still, I was dying to see it.
There are some falls though, that aren't funny. Like the one my daughter took down our basement stairs, while I was right behind her. Seeing her body contort, and flip down the stairs is not something any parent should have to witness. Thankfully she was ok, but I still have to live with that vision. Well, I gave the kids bus driver a similar vision this past winter. Our driveway was covered in black ice, and my daughter (the same one that did the flip down our stairs) refused to move because she was afraid to fall. I got to her just in time for the bus to round the corner, take two steps, and then proceed to loose our footing, and we both went down. Hard. My poor daughter, I totally landed on her, and she came up crying. She was ok, but for a moment there, I thought I may have broken her leg. Our bus driver, who I absolutely love, was horrified. He had of course seen the whole thing. He waited to make sure we were ok, my kids got on the bus, including the one I almost squished, and off they went. It was about an hour later, my mom came upstairs to ask me who was salting the driveway. It was my 75 year old bus driver. He had gone to Lowe's after dropping off the kids, and got a bag of salt for me. I will either have to sleep with this man, or at the very least get him a gift card. I'll probably just get him the gift card!
My mom is the master of falling. Last week she was at her mechanics, and while getting out of her car, she dropped her beloved chap stick. She reached under the seat (that she was still sitting in, with the door open) to reach her lip smacker, lost her balance and fell out of the car. Unfortunately for her, she got her legs stuck in the car, and couldn't get up. Thankfully there were witnesses, and someone helped her get up.
On the heels of this fall, she was sitting on her bed with her dog, removing a tick when she lost her balance, and began to fall. In an attempt to catch herself, she tried to grab onto her nightstand. The way she was positioned only made her left arm perform a complete sweep of the nightstand knocking down all it's contents, and then fall, even more awkwardly to the floor. You can laugh... I did, and someday,  in roughly 4-6 weeks, when her sternum fracture heals, she's going to find it just as amusing as the rest of us!  

The Week That Tried To Kill Me...

My girls have been sick this week..well, at least one of them has been, and the other is faking a stomach ache so that she doesn't have to go to school without her sister. She is terrified of being there without her sister. I don't blame her, and I remember what it felt like when I had to go to school for the first time without my twin. My girl who really is sick, did the same thing when the faker was sick, except that on day number 2, and after I told her what it was like for me, she decided to try it. She claimed it was the best day after. No one confused her with anyone!
It doesn't work like that for the faker. She's one of my more sensitive children (they are all sensitive, but this one, and my youngest son take the cake for drama..) She couldn't bear the thought of her sister and I (her two most favorite people in the entire world) carrying on a day without her..what would we do? and what would she miss..she's not quite there yet. They are however, both going tomorrow, come hell, high water, or the second coming of Christ, they are going!
It has been a long few weeks..my mother has been sick, but not her normal sick where the doctors scratch their heads and go "hmm? this is weird". She had double pneumonia. Unfortunately, in order to be diagnosed with that, you must first start with bronchitis for a couple of weeks, followed by days of antibiotics, and days of still feeling like shit. Then you must visit the clinic on the weekend, because you are SO sick and you can't figure out why. A chest xray confirms pneumonia, and you are sent home with more antibiotics (this time stronger ones) and inhalers. Then.... (there's a lot to this double pneumonia thing!) roughly 3 days later, you will wake up only in a t-shirt and, have no memory of the previous night. You will struggle to keep your shit together mentally. Finally,your daughter, who has been caring for you as best as she can with 4 kids of her own to take care of, and her twin sisters twin boys, who can be a handful..and a small little business..takes you to the ER. There, you will be told you have double pneumonia. Easy peasy lemon squeezy.  No worries, you'll be out in 5 days and feel like yourself in a month or so!
Good lord. I'm looking forward to a couple of hours to myself in the  morning..until I have to  pick up my nephews at their bus stop..and hopefully, we are going to have a great day, free of sickness, whining, and trips to the ER.

A Closer Look at Mirror Twins..

My sister and I did a phone interview with the founders of Twinologys.com They're a new website designed for twins, people who know twins, or just about anyone. Check it out, and join their site..just cause!! ;)  click here for our story...

And the Winner is..

I won tickets to be an audience member at Live w/Kelly's post oscar show in California.. I never try and win anything..really, I don't. And I'm not sure why I entered to win this one, but I did, and yay.. Unfortunately, plane tickets to California aren't cheap..not from NH anyway, and "winning" their already free tickets doesn't include airfare.. so, unless someone offers to fly me there, looks like I'll be missing it.. suckage. But how cool is it that I almost got to go? yea, not really cool at all.. my husband was actually pretty excited about it, but then of course reminded me of how poor we are, and that it would be irresponsible if we went (there are 2 tickets btw). I told him it would be much cheaper if my sister went with me.. you know, cause she would pay her own way..that only made him think it was more irresponsible..I'm still working on it.. we shall see!

Whalesvagina

The other day my husband was trying to log onto an online account of mine, and ended up having to change the password. This is a copy of the email he sent me:

                   "I got you back up. had to change your password to "whalesvagina."

This is why after being together for 20 years, I still love him so.. he makes me laugh, and totally gets me, most of the time anyway! And before any of you think that he was referrring to me, with the whalesvagina comment, it's from one of our favorite movies "Anchorman" with Will Ferrell.. so settle down! ;)

The Odd's...

Have I shared my twin story with you? Well, if you want to catch yourself up, you can go here, or here..

I was referred to the current issue of National Geographic because it was all about twins. I found a genetic researcher who is trying to find a genetic link to identical twins. It has always been thought that identical twins were a fluke and that only fraternal twins (when hyper ovulation occurs) was genetic and passed down from mother to daughter.
I have been searching for years to find another set of identical twins, who have also given birth to identical twins. I emailed the genetic researcher, and he quickly responded with a photo of another set of identical twins, who each had identical twins in the UK.  The only difference was that they were male twins, so the mom's were not twins. As far as this researcher knows, and he knows A LOT, we are the only set of female identical twins, to have each given birth to identical twins. Not to mention, again, all of the mirror traits that my sister and I have shared...not only genetic things that are beyond our control, like her being a lefty and me being a righty, she's nearsighted, I'm farsighted. I have a widow's peak, and she can roll her r's.. which is in fact genetic (I was pretty surprised by that one!) when I try to roll my r's, I look like an idiot, and end up just spitting everywhere..it's not pretty.
We also share other mirror traits, that I don't believe have anything to do with genetics, and without sounding like a total flake, I can only just tell the facts: my sister had the most common type of id. pregnancies where her boys shared a placenta. I had the rarest id. pregnancy because my girls each had their own placenta, I was told there was a 20% chance that they were identical. However, because each of my girls were in their own sack, I had the safest type of twin pregnancy, where my sister had the riskier pregnancy because of the threat of twin to twin transfusion (which one of her boys suffered from slightly after birth, but he is totally fine). Her boys were due on Thanksgiving, mine were conceived on Thanksgiving..Her babies were all born in the fall and winter, mine were all born in the spring and summer. All of our twins were born on the 22nd day of different months.
It has this meant to be thing..ya know? it's hard to explain.. but it's exciting! We are going to participate in the study for the genetic researcher. I'm working on a pedigree (which I thought only applied to dogs..but a las, I have learned something new...not hard for a natural blonde!) I've actually discovered some pretty cool things about my fathers side. I'm not sure if I've mentioned here that my dad's family (on his mom's side) are direct descendants of Paul Revere. He's an uncle 20 or so times removed. And I'm instantly tugged to try and convince you (my one reader) that it's true..probably because anyone I ever told growing up, never believed me, which is pretty funny if you think about it..who would make up a story about being related to Paul Revere? If I wanted to be cool, I would have said Santa was my grandfather!  Anyway, my great grandmothers maiden name was Revere and with things like ancestry.com, there has been a confirmed link. And the cool part is that there are a bunch of twins on that side...
I have lots to do..another website is airing our story (my sister and I did a phone interview, I'll link it when it airs..) And there's another website- a twin website, that will be featuring our story as well. This one includes homework though (they sent me a list of questions and want pictures and so on), and even with my A.D.D. meds, I'm still procrastinating and having a hard time finishing it. But if it turns out cool, I'll put a link here also. Ok, I gotta go.. my husband is cleaning the girls room, after discovering one of the girls has been hiding food in her closet. Not because she is nurturing an eating disorder, but because if her plate is clean, then she can have dessert..unfortunately, no one happened to see her disappear into her room with her plate. sneaky little bugger!

Here's a twin picture we did last fall.. this was taken by the wonderfully talented Danielle, go check out her website, she's amazing.. http://www.dmacinnesphotography.com/

Give Away..

Who doesn't like free stuff?  I've made a bag for a new website called Betty Everything. Today we are launching a contest to win one of my bags.. a very nice, sleek messenger bag. One of my favorites.. If you want to enter, you need to go to my facebook page,  Add It Up Designs, and look for the details. Good luck, here's a peek at the bag I'm giving away..

The neighbor kid...

There's a kid in our neighborhood, who is 9. He's a friend of my youngest son. He's here a lot. He was here most of the summer. He's a nice kid, and my girls love him. His mom asked me at the beginning of the school year, if I would watch him a few days a week after school, and that she would pay me. I told her fine, even though the thought of having another kid to watch made me hesitate.  It's nice at the end of the day to just have my own kids. However, who am I to say no? That's unfortunately not my style,  a backbone is required for that, and we all know that I don't have one.
One day after school, when all hell was breaking lose because my girls were tired, and screaming at me, and because I was trying to get dinner ready, the dishes done and snacks passed out, I heard a voice behind me say "excuse me, Mrs. F?"  It's the neighbor kid, who has been sitting there watching the chaos "I think you're a really good mom" My heart has melted, and I said "awhh, thank you, that's really nice" and he continues, "you do so much for everyone! My mom just gets stressed out" Then he walks away.
It was the nicest thing anyone has said to me in a long time. Of course that moment faded quickly, when one of the girls started screaming at me for water, or something they can certainly get for themselves, but refuse to because apparently I owe them this because I have sent them away to school for the day. I announced to everyone what our neighbor had just said. In a sort of "see, someone thinks I'm awesome, now shut the fuck up!" kind of way (without cussing of course)
Anyway, the point of this, is that despite my hesitation to watch him, I'm glad I did. I know he loves it here. His parents recently divorced, so he alternates weeks between his mom's house, and his dads. I think coming here is sort of a refuge of all the stuff at home. He has an older brother, but they don't get along.
The next morning at the bus stop, I asked him if her remembered what he had told me. He said he did. I told him that that was the nicest thing anyone had ever said to me, and that it totally made my day.. he said thanks, and may have blushed a bit... I think that I may have made his day!

Things that I Have Recently Broken...

-the lawn Mower (not our nice new shiny riding one!)

-the chain saw (I know! what was I thinking?)

-the wheelbarrow (same day as the chainsaw!)

-my tailbone.. (long story..)

My husband is having a hard time affording my clumsiness.. sorry dude.

Swimming...

We got one of those metal frame pools this summer, the ones they have at walmart. This was the best $250 bucks we ever spent! The kids LOVED it. And so did I.
For years, we've been saying we needed to get swimming lessons for the kids.. however, having 4 of them, and living on a tight budget, it just never happened. The boys can now swim. The girls are well on their way, but they wore life jackets in the pool because they couldn't stand in it. (it's 4 ft deep).

 Having 7 kids here for the summer made this one of the best places to hang out! Here are the girls with their cousin..

I emptied it yesterday.. drained it right into our leech field (I'm sure that's not a problem!) It's sad to see it laying on the ground..all dirty and slimy. Summer is my favorite season, and I'm sad to see it go. I am already looking forward to setting it up next spring, it'll be up early!! It was a good summer with the pool.. I'm not sure what the kids would have done without it.. it was our "stay cation"!

My dad's father passed away this summer. I had only seen him once, I can't even say that I met him because no one ever introduced him to me.  I got a glimpse though, and I guess that should have been good enough. My grandfather had 3 children with my grandmother. He drank himself into a stupor regularly, and when my dad was a teenager, he left. My dad didn't see him again until he was an adult.
He lived in Alabama, until hurricane Katrina destroyed his single wide, and he was forced to move back to NH, to the 3 kids he had abandoned a couple of decades before. My aunt was his main caregiver, even though he had been absent from her life for several decades. He was one lucky son of a bitch. I'm not sure I would have given him the same respect.
When he passed away, and my father called and told me, I felt sad for what could have been, and for what wasn't. I think my dad may have felt the same way. It wasn't devastating to him, like when he lost his mother back in 1995.  He made a joke about getting an extra week off of work, for bereavement. The silver lining.
My dad has not been a huge part of my life. He's unlike his father though, he didn't leave because he was a drinker, he left because he was 30 years old, with 4 kids (2 of which weren't his) and because he had met another woman. I often look back at those times.. when I was 7, and couldn't for the life of me figure out why my dad didn't want to be with us. I thought I must have done something. If only I had been a better kid.. If only I had behaved.. I understand now how these thoughts aren't rational, but to a 7 year old it was fact.
I think my dad must have felt the same way when he was a kid. Not understanding why his father loved his alcohol more than him.
I missed Father's Day this year. I usually send him a card, maybe give him a call, but this year, I did nothing. Not intentionally, I tortured myself daily about getting my shit together and at least mail him a card. But I failed. A month or so after fathers day, I was on my way to the store, and decided to stop in and see him, he only lives a few miles from my house. I was going there to ask him to borrow some money (summers are so hard with my husband not working- he teaches). Earlier in the spring we had to sink a significant amount of money into our cars, money we were saving for summer. I visited for a while, and just could  not do it. I couldn't ask him for anything, and felt like I was a kid again wishing he could understand what I was feeling, without having to tell him. As I was leaving, and feeling like a total failure for not being able to do what I had gone there to do, I started crying. I told him how sorry I was that I had missed father's day. This show of emotion made him clearly uncomfortable, and confused. He told me not to worry about it, and that he had missed a lot of things too.
I am over being mad at my father for not being there like he should have been. I know he did the best he could.. some people aren't meant to be parents, like his father.. He had no role model, no one to teach him how to be a parent. I know he has regrets.. and I bet if I had gotten up the nerve, he would have given me the shirt off his back. Or at least lent it to me!

Mountain View

I wish I could go to Mountain View California.. just for a couple of days.. to see my boys! They are playing in Neil Young's benefit concert for the Bridge School. All acoustic.. for 2 days.  Maybe next year..

Yup.. another post!

I was diagnosed with ADD last October. It was by coincidence that I made this discovery, and not to go all Dr. Phil and Oprah on ya, but it was my "Ah-ha" moment.  My entire life I had wondered why I never seemed to fit in anywhere.. Why I had always had such a difficult time in school.I'm sure that I had ADD as a child too, I just managed to develop some really good coping skills over the years. Many women are diagnosed after they've had children, often times after they see signs of ADD in their own children, and start reading up on it.. it's Coming to the understanding that I wasn't actually unlearnable, but that my brain had a highly genetic neurological disorder called ADD, let me finally understand why I failed out of college...and why despite other successes in my life, I never really felt like a success. ADD is a disorder, but not necessarily a deficit. Everyone with ADD has the H part as well. The hyperactivity piece. And how this is displayed in people varies. For some people it's their inability to sit still, or control themselves physically. For other people, like myself, the hyperactivity is happening in my brain. I am a constant flutter of thoughts, and ideas. Struggling constantly to focus on one thing at a time. For me, the medication takes away the fluttering. It slows it down, and allows me to focus on one thing at a time.
After I was diagnosed with ADD, I started to see it in everyone I was close to, and yes, everyone loved being diagnosed by yours truly!
I have continued to see my therapist, she's a great guide for me as I work through the junk that comes with having ADD. When I started thinking about how my undiagnosed ADD had taken away so much potential from me, it got me super pissed, and super motivated. That was when I started sewing like crazy. The meds were helping me stay focused. and I could create, and finish  projects.  I got a bunch of bags, put them on facebook, and sold 50 pieces in a month. This diagnosis of ADD has left me feeling raw and exposed. Which is why I've never blogged about it before. Soon after my diagnosis, my husband went in for an evaluation as well. He's tried medication (which in my opinion, worked really well for him) But he's decided that he would rather not take anything. We are all a work in progress..In other news, my girls are doing amazing in kindergarten. They love it! Like the boys, they have completely done the opposite of what I thought they would do. They get on the bus, excited, and happy.. and once again, it was me who worried more than them. I am adjusting to the peace and quiet that comes when all your kids are in school. The best part is how clean my house stays! yay!

Kindergarten for the twins..

Tomorrow morning, my girls are starting kindergarten. I'm not sure how this happened.. It literally seems like yesterday I was bringing both of them home from the hospital, and settling into the insanity of having two babies at once (along with my boys who were 3 and 6 at the time).
I have been waiting for this day for almost as long as they were born.. All four of my children in school. And now that it's here, I'm feeling all sorts of unsettled emotions..joy, sadness, anxiety, disbelief.. How is it that my babies are 5? And that my oldest son is 11! He started junior high last week..and is loving it! Thank goodness that boy adjusts well to change. My youngest son has started 3rd grade, and is loving it also.. My girls, on the other hand, are not loving it so much. There were months when my daughters refused to talk about school. The  mere mention of it would send them over the edge. They are so afraid of  missing me.. They remind me so much of my sister and I, when we were their age. I remember being dropped off at kindergarten, and both of us having to pulled off of my mom's legs, screaming. This was sort of what happened back in June when the girls went in for orientation.. I left the classroom, with both of them screaming for me. I could hear them in the parking lot and felt like a complete failure.. how could I not have prepared them for this? Although the only preparation for it was talking about it, which I tried.. and since enrolling twins in preschool on a teachers budget wasn't a possibility, I felt as though I had totally screwed over my own kids.
I'm over that now though.. (thanks to my wonderful therapist) I know I didn't fail them, in fact it's not a bad thing when your kids are bonded to you, right? like glue, with curly hair..   I am still going to be babysitting for my nephews, who will be 4 next month (hard to believe, I know!) I will have 3 hours, 3 days a week, with no kids in my house! holy shite. I've been in a bit of a panic though.. what now? what do I do with all my children in school? The thought of going back to an office job makes me want to hurl. Really, I would rather have another baby! I still have time to figure that out though.. right now, I'm just going to try to get through the next few weeks with all the changes going on..
Maybe I'll have time to write more on my blog..  I'm going to be sewing more.. I have gotten pretty good at it (if I do say so myself).  I sold a bunch of my bags at a consignment shop in Portsmouth over the summer. My goal for now is to keep busy enough with that, so that I won't have to join the workforce- ever! I will be my own work force!
Wish my girls luck on their first day of school (and their mother too!)

How To Hookwink Someone into Touching Your 3rd Nipple...

Oh, let me explain.. I went to see my doctor yesterday for a "suspicious mole" that I found on my abdomen, right at the top of my rib cage, under my right breast (or skin bags, which is the best description for them at this point) I worried about this mole.. for a few days in fact. I knew it had been there my whole life, but recently, it was becoming easily irritated, and looked different.
I have been seeing my doctor for 16 years. She has twins, like myself, and she is one of those doctor's that never makes you feel rushed, and always remember intimate details without having to check her notes. She's genuine, and I just love her. So, when I showed up in her office with  my mole, I  felt completely at ease in her hands. She had me lay back on the table, and had a look at the cause of visit. Immediately, she told me that it wasn't cancerous. Instantly, I felt relieved. For a second anyway.. here's how the rest of the visit went: the dialogue is key..

Dr. L (giggling) "you have to look at this, can you see it?"
Me: (trying to contort myself and see under my boob) "um, yea, what? is it a skin tag or something?"
Dr. L (still giggling) "no, really look at it.. what does it look like"
Me: (getting confused..) "um, really, no idea.."
Dr. L "no, can you see how it's sort of rigid, and shaped like another part of your body?"
Me (finally "getting it") "no shit!"
Dr. L: (straight out howling) "It's a 3rd nipple!!!!!"

Of course it is.
So, this 3rd nipple of mine (which surprisingly my husband did not find sexy at all) is about 2 mm wide, and seriously looks like a mole.. to the naked eye.

So, back to the title of the post.. how do you hoodwink someone into touching your 3rd nipple? I was pretty surprised at how easy it was. First, I showed my friend (let's call her Hillary Peacock) my suspicious mole. I said "isn't that weird?"  she says "yea, what is that?"  I say, "touch it, it's weird" of course she touches it (she's one of my best friends, and I am totally exploiting her trust in me.. I know, it's genius!)  "That IS weird! what is that?" "IT'S MY 3RD NIPPLE!!!"
It was fun.

Christmas with the Nielsons.. sort of.

A couple of weeks ago, I sent away one of my favorite handmade bags.. in hopes that Stephanie Nielson, and her husband Christian would review it on their blog the nie nie diaglogues (which btw is a nationally read blog.. this woman was on Oprah for crying outloud!!)  All week they have been showcasing some of their favorite homemade gifts that readers all over the country had sent in. They recieved hundreds of gifts, and couldn't put all of them on their blog..
My cute little bag did not get a review, but at the end of her final post today, there was a list of other "cool, creative, homemade" sites (let's call them honorable mentions..) and my little store at etsy was on it! I was beyond excited! I was mostly flattered because all week as I checked her blog, and saw all of the beautiful creations being sent in, I thought for sure, that I was out of my league, and my cute little bag, was not worth a nod, or a mention, never mind a link to my store!
It made my day.. quite possibly my month!!

Add It Up Designs..

So much has been happening with me.. and I don't have the time, or the words to go into it.. but it's all good.. changes in a positive way, that I'm really happy with.
I'm taking the plunge and starting an on line store with some of my stuff.. I'm building inventory, so at this point, I only have 2 things on there.. that will change soon though.. I hope to be able to sit down and write about what's up with me..but for now, I'm just going to be busy sewing away..
http://www.etsy.com/shop/additupdesigns?ref=pr_profile

I Love Him..

That's all..
I know I have a lot of updating to do.. but I got this picture tonight, and I thought I would share... not only does this handsome man love me, despite everything, he also has made my dreams come true, in so many ways, but he's also given me the cutest litter a bitch could hope for! ;)

Storyland, Lyme, and a Stroke..

It has been one hell of a week..let me tell you! I'll start at the beginning.. last Thursday morning my mom called me from her apartment downstairs saying that she needed to go to the E.R. because the left side of her face was numb. Thankfully, my sister was here and was able to bring her (otherwise, I would have had to call an ambulance because as big as my loser cruiser is, it still won't fit 7 kids in it).
It wasn't long that I got a call from my mom who had been told that she had had a stroke. jeezus. They were confident that it was a small one, but still, a stroke none the less.
She was put into the progressive care unit, a step down from the intensive care unit and closely monitored. I went to see her later that day, and while I was at work, I started to get an intense pain in my left arm. It lasted all night, but was gone by the morning.. My mom was put into a "normal" room, and was improving. She suffered some weakness on her left side, but was quickly regaining her strength.
The next night, I started having the left arm pain again, only this time, it was more intense. I've always had a high tolerance for pain, but this was unlike anything I had experienced before. I was getting worried at this point.. but then I woke up on Saturday morning, and again the pain was gone. We had been planning an over night trip with the kids to Storyland for our last summer hoorah. I wasn't comfortable leaving while my mother was still in the hospital, but she insisted that we keep our plans, and the kids would have been devestated.
So, off we went early Saturday morning to the funnest place on Earth (or at least the funnest place in Northern NH for kids 10 and under..) It was a beautiful day, and we all had a really fun time. I got a call from my sister around noon, letting me know that my mom was going to be discharged that day, and that she was feeling much better. My older sister would spend the night with her, in case she needed anything. This was a huge relief, and I enjoyed the rest of the day with my family.
We checked into our "suite" later that afternoon. The kids were in awe of where we were staying (and really, for the money, it was awesome) We had a seperate bedroom for my husband and I, a murphy bed in the living room, a pullout couch, balcony, and a full kitchen. It was great. They also had a heated pool, and a hot tub. The boys couldn't wait to go swimming, so we started the long task of getting 4 kids ready for the pool. While changing in the bathroom, I noticed a red mark on my back, near my shoulder blade. A bullseye. It all clicked. The pain in my arm for the past two nights..it was lyme disease.
For the second time that day, I felt relief. While I wasn't psyched at all about lyme disease, at least I knew it wasn't something to do with my heart, or a pinched nerve in my neck. I googled everything I could about it, before I was dragged down to the pool by my family.
It wasn't until later, while we were at dinner, that the pain in my arm came back, and I started getting the chills. Since I had gotten out of the pool, I couldn't warm up. I had a fever. Later that night, I emailed blogless (who is also a nurse) and asked her advice..she called me and said I should be fine, but that I needed to see a doctor soon. I planned on heading to the E.R. when I got home the next day.
So, to sum it all up.. my mom is doing better, but she's tired. I'm on the  mend, but I think it's going to be a while until I'm back to myself. I must have gotten the tick bite a few weeks ago. I remember thinking that I had gotten a mosquito bite, and when I went to scratch it one day, something came off (quite painfully too) Then I kept telling myself that I needed to check on that.. but like most things that don't concern my kids or what I'm doing at that percise moment, it slipped my mind. That should teach me!
In other non sickness related news, my boys started school yesterday. Second and Fifth grade.. my youngest son didn't want to go.. he was nervous.. what if he couldn't do 2nd grade math?? But he came home and had had an "awesome" first day.. and his teacher was soooo nice! Yay for that.. My oldest son couldn't wait to get back and see all of his friends.. he was also very excited because his teacher this year is our next door neighbor, and she's great! They're both off to a good start!!